what IN THE WORLD is going on?

a further taste of the world i dun belong to last weekend.. my project was sabotaged, the person who promised to help ate his word, & it's my responsibility tt all these happened. WHAT IN THE WORLD IS GOING ON? i really couldn't see the logic of all tt's happening. very upset i was, spoke to my prof i did. guess his reply...

it's normal, he said. you've encountered sthg tt you'll nvr find in the textbooks... yar i know... & i need your advice lor, not just an analysis of the world tt i've already tasted even b4 i step out to work. & it's totally not encouraging to someone who have nvr seen the evil side of the world yet. well, at least he had assured tt my grade wun b exactly affected by the report of the company, & there were some wisdom in his words as he told me certain things regarding the working world. wisdom? yes, i said some wisdom, not by his measure or mine, but by the Scriptures. nope, he is not a Christian, but it's through experience tt he accumulated those wisdom & shared with me. this can only show even more tt the truth in the bible are still being fulfilled even up to today. i was reading Proverbs (just reading thru cos there's too much wisdom in it tt i totally can't understand) & 2 verses were kinda describing wat he shared with me. "the first one to plead his case seems right, until his neighbour comes & examines him." (Prov 18:17) "a prudent man foresees evil & hides himself, but the simple pass on & are punished." (Prov 22:3)

he reminded me to seek wisdom in dealing with things in the working world, to learn to do the morally right things (& whatever good things) in a different manner so tt i dun offend the wicked & get myself "killed". yet there are many things tt he shared with me tt i felt was quite worldly & selfish, or shld i quote him "for self-preservation".

LORD, teach me Your ways, grant me wisdom, discernment & protection, so tt i can continue to shine for You in the workplace w/o having to compromise Your teachings for self-preservation. teach me to put my trust solely in You & no one else, for You alone are my strength & refuge & wisdom. FATHER, let me not be shaken by what i've seen in the world but may i be used by You to minister to my brothers & sisters in Christ using the experience tt You've given me. i give thanks for all these tt had happened (tho i dun enjoy any bit of it) in the name of JESUS my LORD, amen.

Dead or Alive

just ended a funeral in my family: my youngest aunt's. she was 43 years & 19 days old when she was called home to be with the Lord. to my non-believing family members, she's gone, totally lost forever. to me & my Christian relatives, she has gone home to Daddy b4 us. is she dead? is she alive? was her spirit still ard for a moment b4 gg home for good, or did she go home immediately when she gave up her last breath?

it was quite a hard time grieving at the loss...sometimes, i found myself asking God, why did He have to take her home so soon? my cousin's getting married in Nov, at least wait till then mah... Daddy simply gave me an answer: she had enough, she had enough. that was enough for me. my aunt was bedridden since she was abt 13 years old. given her frail body, she shld've gone home long ago, but God has been gracious enough to sustain her till now, wat more can we ask for? besides, she really has suffered enough on tt bed for 30 years, practically immobile. Now tt she has gone home to Daddy, she 's totally free, no more pain, no more tears, no more suffering but eternal joy in the presence of God, why r we still sad tt we had "lost" her? i guess, having her lie at the same place for so many years, we r so used to seeing her there, now tt her place is empty...

i believe when God took her home, He has in His mind His own glory, where in His glory, people can find comfort & joy, even at a loss of a loved one. at her wake & funeral services, that was the 1st time ever tt the gospel of God is preached in the family. prior to that, there was no such chance tt the gospel can be preached to the family as a whole. Non-believing relatives began to ask qns, backsliden Christians began to seek God, & Christians grew stronger in unity & in prayer. broken relationships were restored. all these is for the glory of the Lord & i pray tt this will continue to carry on...

Satan was active in our midst in the last few days in our grief. there were quarrels & fights, but God's presence was with us & it only binds Christians to be closer in prayer, learning to trust Him even more.

personally for me, these few days were the times when i prayed & interceded the most for my family & took lead in bringing the younger ones in prayer. thru my aunt's death, the world no longer seems tt real to me while the hope of the glory of God became even more a reality... she is dead in flesh, yet i know she is alive in the presence of God, right at this moment. we miss you, aunt, but i know we will see you again when it's time for us to go home to God...

Stabbed

not literal, but at work... gosh... 1st "injury" even b4 i really step into the working world. when your colleagues think tt u r a threat to them, they'll try all they can to stab u in the back, esp if they have some backing.

u see, i din do anything to harm anyone, but my presence there at the factory is threatening to those who dun have substance in their work & v conveniently cheat in readings to achieve the results tt the customers require. being a student, i m inquisitive towards how things r run at the factory, so obviously i would b talking to pple & asking qns. my assailant went to tell his good pal, my supervisor, tt i din do any work, & always talking... of cos i m always talking cos my sup din even give me any job scope, so i had to talk to pple to find out stuff & to find for myself my project for IA. also, he wasn't happy tt i was resistant to his "commands"... c'mon, he's only a chemist, not my sup, yet when he needs me to help him, he treats me like a general worker & orders me to do a general worker's job. of cos i dun need to heed his orders, tt's y he backstabbed me. i meant, c'mon, if u r not my sup, & u want me help, u dun order me ard but u would ask/request for my help, i'll b more than happy to help if i can. but not if i was ordered ard.

i think my sup knows it, cos after he "lectured" me, he told me to help as a chemist. well, since he tells me to be kinda asst chemist, den of cos i'll b glad to help.

just wanna share this w u guys, cos i hope to prepare u guys for work. the world out there only see power & money. nothing else. no ethics, no morals, no standards, just do anything to climb up the ladder or to survive. for me as Christians, i was ashamed to say i was reminded of the Lord by a Buddhist. i was still sored from the backstabbing when this old Buddhist man mentioned tt there is Someone above watching. immediately, i remembered the Lord. He was betrayed, crucified sinless, humiliated & suffered. if He could endure all tt for the glory of God the Father, why can't i endure the backstabbing in Christ for the glory of God?

i guess after saying all these, our source of strength to lead a Christ-like life in the working world has to be Christ alone. we have to keep our walk with God even closer when we begin to work, & have our eyes fixed only on Him, so tt the temptation of money & power, & the disruptions from office politics will not take toll in our lives.

do continue to pray for me as i look forward to ending my IA in 3 mths time... :)